From the inside
by ForgottenWhispers
Summary: Ray is in hospital and Kai pays him a visit, he needs to make a confession.


From the inside

Disclaimer: Don't own Beyblade, if I did Ray and Kai would be together and Tyson would get a better stylist...I swear I see Ash from Pokemon everytime I see him. Please tell me I'm not the only one. The song by Linkin Park isn't mine either.

Summary: Ray has a visitor while he lies in the hospital. Its amazing how a little thing like unconciuousness bring out the talker in a person. WOW WOW WOW! It's a happy day, I am actually writing a 1 shot in which our fav neko-jin is actually still alive when our fav Russian admits his feelings. No real thing, mostly fluff. Thank you NJWolf for the quotes. This really is rawish as I haven't been over it mroe than once, so any errors please forgive me.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

He's lying there. Sleeping, resting, recuperating. He'll wake tomorrow, atleast that's what the doctor says. Till then I can let this go. I have a release for this pent up emotion, this burning deep within me that can't be cooled by anything. Save for its release. Thats why I'm here. I am letting it go. So what if he can't hear me, I'm still telling him.

The moon shines down on him, he's so beautiful, so amazing. And I fell for him. I, the cold hearted bastard. I the emotionless being made of stone. I the coward who runs from all he feels. Does that make them all better than me? I don't think so. Tyson will never be better than me. NEVER. But he isn't the one who is important. No, its the one who is lying in the hospital bed.

A sea of inky black hair lays about him, emphasising the paleness of his skin, I can't fight the urge and my hand shakily leans out to touch it. Soft, flowing...there is so many words I could use to describe it, but it would never do him justice. He lays here, quiet, resting. Its moments like this that make me wonder what allowed me this pleasure, this right to be in this heavenly creatures company. I have done so much wrong, hurt so many. I had hurt him.

_"I resented being thrown in with a bunch of No Talents."_

I had said those words, and I had said so much more. Now that I look back on it I don't know why I allowed such an unworthy cause, such a foolish and unattainable cause, bring me to such a level. My desire, my thirst for Power had blinded me and because of my lapse into delusions embrace I allowed myself to be used. It would have ended differently had Max been the one there and Ray on his way, I wouldn't have hesitated. I would have taken their Bit beasts and left them there in the vast and unforgiving land that is known as Russia. Cold, like I was. Yet I didn't, Max hadn't been umong them and I didn't take their Bit beasts. Why?

The answer to that question is resting in the hospital bed before me. A single, solitary, tear had traveled down the side of his cheek. It was small enough that none of them saw, but I saw it. I saw that tear and it broke my heart. I had always prided myself in being strong and free, yet I had become a willing servant for my Grandfather, and in doing so I had betrayed the one thing, other than Dranzer, that meant anything to me.

Him.

So where did such a revelation leave me? Knee deep in ice cold water, and sinking even more. That was when they held their hands out, calling, encouraging and begging me to grab hold of them. I hadn't heard them, but I had heard him. All had vanished and it was only him and I standing there, he held his hand out and told me to take it. I did, I felt electricity shoot up my arm as our hands touched and his fingers wrapped around my wrist. Then everything came rushing back, Tyson, Kenny and Max were all pulling along with him. My feet were stuck to the surface of the ice slab, yet they managed to pull me out. They gave me back Dranzer, I had accepted her return to me and had left to talk with my Grandfather. I left afterwards, I returned to my old team, to him.

_" To become the Best one must Defeat the Best."_

I still can't believe I said those words, now I come to confess and beg for forgiveness... or take my punishment.

_" I'm going to run you through the ringer."_

"Bryan." I growl the name out, I thought I hated my Grandfather for all he did to me, but Bryan would always be someone I felt hatred for. He had hurt you, he didn't see that you were a gift, a treasure. He hurt you and for that the Gods themselves will hate him. I will hate him.

I indulge myself by tracing your cheek with the tips of my fingers. So soft, you truly are a gift. A prize, but not. One cannot win you in any contest, you choose the victor. You choose the loser. What can I say to help sway your judgement? What can I do to help melt your heart?

I lean forward, as close as I dare. I can feel your breathe warm the side of my neck, making the skin prickle and more sensitive. I hope you can hear what I'm about to tell you.

"I love you, more than anything." I said it, I whispered it into his ear. He doesn't move, his breathing doesn't change. I sigh, I knew this would happen, what could I expect, he is unconsious.

_"Kai. How could you!"_

His words run through my head, burning me. How can I change what I did, what I said? Maybe times like this are when you turn to prayer? I've never prayed before, religion wasn't a big thing in the Abbey. Does Ray pray? Does he have a guardian? If so, where was that guardian when Bryan hurt him? It's easier to shift the blame to another...much easier.

_'Where were you?'_ Me, I was with the others, but something tells me the question was aimed at another time. Where was I when the White Tigers lost their Bit Beasts? Right there, I took them. Where was I when the AllStars lost theirs? I was their too, mocking them as I took their beasts. I was there all the time, but at the same time not...that sounds weird. I shake my head. I'm here to confess, not get side tracked.

I do that a lot, when I was going to tell him the first time...that had ended with me yelling at him. The second time had been ruined because he fell asleep. The third? This is the third.

_' Third times the charm.'_

Typical Max, stupid sayings for a small mind...okay maybe not small, but doped most of the time...if sugar highs could fall under that.

ENOUGH! I have to tell him, it's now or never.

"Who's...there.." I froze, a voice as gentle as the sea lapping the sand on a calm day filled the space, I tried not to answer, but I had to.

"Hi Ray."

Amber eyes were revealed to me as they widened in surprise. "Kai...what are you doing here...you're going to get into trouble." I wanted to laugh, he was lying in the hospital bed, thanks to my former team mate, and he was worried about me getting into trouble. "It's okay Ray, no one is going to catch me." He seemed to calm at my assurances, either that or the meds were kicking in again.

"Why are you here?" I sighed, what do I tell him...or rather, HOW do I tell him? " I needed to say something to you."

He nodded." Kai...I'm sorry, I messed up with Bryan. I almost lost the match."

I froze. _'That's not what I wanted to talk about!'_

"I don't care about that."

He froze, his face paling even more. In someway I had hurt him with that comment. There, I did it again, I hurt him.

_"All together again, Never Again! The days of Kai the bladebreaker are through"_

My words hit me like ton of bricks, they condemned me, just as my actions had done. Here I stand, a traitor, a thief and a deciever, trying to tell another soul, a spotless and pure soul, that I love them. The very thought would make anyone else sick, but I can't stop it. I have to do this.

" I mean, there was no other way. None of us could have done it, except for you. You should be proud of your achievement."

His eyes widened, a blush tinting his cheeks. I had caught him off guard. I decided to finish what I started while he was still in shock. " I came here to tell you something, I respected you Ray, more than I respected anyone before."

He seemed to nod, his mind was probably caugh on the use of past tense, I'd hoped he would miss that. Now I had to tell him the rest, or risk hurting his feelings even more.

" Now it's gone beyond respect. At first I didn't know what it was, only that I felt it. Now I know though. I ...I ...I li...ke you a lot." He seemed smile at me, but there was confusion in his eyes. Okay here came the bombshell, hopefully he wasn't the kind to scream when he was disgusted.

" IloveyoumorethanIsay,IwasjusttoofrightenedyouwouldhatemeifItoldyou.ThatsallIwantedtosay."

He frowned. Great going Kai, he hates you.

"Could you say that slower."

I blush and nod. I took a deep breath them said my little decleration again, this time making sure each word was heard. " I love you more than I say, I was just too frightened you would hate me if I told you. That's all I wanted to say." He froze again, i flinched. Here it comes, the denial, the rejection, the whole nine yards.

But what ever Ray was going to say was cut short as we heard someone coming. Ray motioned for me to hide under the bed, then he made sure the blankets hid me from veiw. I heard him shift on the bed, probably pretending to sleep. The door squeaked open, I could just see the nurses feet from under the blanket. She must have just come to peak in because a moment later she was gone and the door closed. I breathed a sigh of relief and started to climb out. By the time I was out Ray had sat up. He motioned for me to sit on the bed. I sat there, mentally steeling myself for the rejection.

" I...feel...the same."

My eyes flew open. Had I head right. I looked at him, and noticed that his blush had become deeper. I smiled, and he smiled too. My mind told me I had to do something, an idea came to mind. I leant forward and gently gave him a peck on the lips. I pulled away and both of us blushed even more, he gave a soft giggle before sighing. I frown. He pointed a clock." You have to go, incase they come in again." I nod and make my way to his window. I turn and he blows me a kiss, blushing even more. I grin and do the same.

" Goodnight Kai, will you visit me tomorrow?"

I nod. Hell yeah. Does a Russian like vodka.

"Goodnight, I'll see you tomorrow. I'll come a half hour before the rest of them do. That way w have some alone time."

He nods and snuggles into the blankets. I give him one last look and climb out the window. I close it behind me and wave to him through the glass. He waves back and then closes his eyes.

I make my way back tot he hotel. Quite pleased with myself. I had faced my fears and now I had the one thing I loved more than anything.

My Ray.

The end

Like I said, fluff.


End file.
